CORONA BOOKS UK

facebook twitter

www.coronabooks.com

The Great British Limerick Book - Filthy limericks for (nearly) every town in the UK

by Lewis Williams

Surely it can’t be done. But it has been done. For the first time in the history of mankind someone has been dedicated enough and fool enough to write a filthy limerick for every town in the UK which, unlike Leeds or Devizes, doesn’t already have a classic filthy limerick to call its own.

 

From Land’s End to John o’ Groats, The Great British Limerick Book has a filthy limerick for your town, for your uncle’s town, for your cousin’s husband’s ex-wife’s town ... as long as it’s in the UK and as long as it isn’t one of those few places that are really impossible to find a rhyme for.

 

There are over 900 limericks in the book. A lot of them are hilarious. Most of them are very funny. All of them are filthy.

The Isle of Skye, Scotland

Guildford, Surrey

Ashington, Northumberland

amazon-button

Nuneaton, Warwickshire

When I was on the Isle of Skye

I overdid the old Spanish fly

I had a stiff member

From the fourth of December

Till Friday the tenth of July

At McDonald's in Guildford in Surrey

I spilt coffee on my crotch in a scurry

I had to act quick

To cool down my dick

So I stuck it into my McFlurry

In Ashington there was a miner

Whose wife was a fashion designer

One night to his shock

She dressed him up as a cock

And herself as a six foot vagina

There was a young man from Nuneaton

Who really enjoyed being beaten

And squeezing his knackers

With a pair of nut crackers

And riding a bike with no seat on

For the latest details of new and forthcoming titles please see our home page or sign up for email updates here

AVAILABLE NOW

AVAILABLE NOW

The Scottish Limerick Book - Filthy limericks for every town in the Scotland

by Lewis Williams

From the author of The Great British Limerick Book, comes a new book with more of the very finest in vulgar humour and a filthy limerick for every town in Scotland. The Scottish Limerick Book includes scores of newly written limericks and covers Scotland so comprehensively that it gives every town, city or village in the country with a population of 3,000 people or more a filthy limerick to call its own.

 

There are over 250 limericks in the book. A lot of them are hilarious. Most of them are very funny. All of them are filthy.

Scottish Limerick Book COVER - medium

Beith, North Ayrshire

They staged a biblical play once in Beith

But the costumes were a little too brief

The end of Adam’s wang

Did quite clearly hang

Out from under his tiny fig leaf

Grangemouth, Falkirk

In Grangemouth there’s an oil refinery

A port, a canal and a winery

And to thrill you to bits

All the girls have 10 tits

That is if you count them in binary

 

Harris, Western Isles

There was a young man from Harris

Who cast his dick in plaster of paris

He put it on a stand

And thought it looked grand

On the dashboard of his Toyota Yaris

 

166 pages  ISBN 978-0-9932472-1-7

320 pages  ISBN 978-0-9932472-0-0

amazon-button TGBLB2016lesssticker(small)

AVAILABLE NOW

Child of Winter Cover front small

Child of Winter

Ten dark and twisted tales

by T. R. Hitchman

154 pages ISBN 978-0-9932472-3-1

An old woman harbours a painful secret and meets a troubled man with a dark secret of his own; a narcissistic journalist learns that the camera can tell the truth in more ways than one; and a man makes the worst mistake he ever made in his life in discovering that sometimes you shouldn’t talk to strangers ... Ten stories of love, loss and disappointment with a dark twist that are the product of the imagination of writer, T.R. Hitchman, the new master of modern macabre.

T.R. Hitchman’s first crush was on Christopher Lee. She grew up in love with the eerie stories of Edgar Allen Poe and, as a child of the eighties, was profoundly affected by being allowed to stay up late to watch Hammer House of Horror on TV. She has written for The Gothic Society and her acclaimed novella, The Homecoming, was published electronically in 2014. It is included here in revised form, along with nine other equally brilliant dark and twisted tales in her debut story collection, Child of Winter.

About the author

amazon-button

AVAILABLE NOW

Oxbridge Limerick front final SMALL amazon-button

The Oxbridge Limerick Book

Filthy limericks for every college in Oxford and Cambridge

by Lewis Williams

156 pages  ISBN 978-0-9932472-4-8

Presenting the very finest in vulgar humour, The Oxbridge Limerick Book revives the ancient and noble art of the filthy limerick, injects it with a large dose of twenty-first century humour and applies it to the venerable institutions of Oxford and Cambridge, giving every college in the two universities a filthy limerick to call its own. The results will cause hilarity and provoke outrage, with what is quite possibly the best and most original little book of filthy limericks to be published since 1928.

About the author

Lewis Williams went to Darwin College, Cambridge (for one evening, that is, in 2015 for a dinner he was invited to). On the other hand, he did genuinely work at Oxford University for a number of years.  His ignominious departure from its employ had nothing whatsoever to do with his writing rude limericks concerning the place or its employees. He is the author of The Great British Limerick Book and The Scottish Limerick Book. He hasn’t devoted the whole of his recent past to the art of writing filthy limericks, either. He is also up to over level 400 on Candy Crush.

Corona Books RGB v2015.1 Medium icon square - Copy Amazonlarge kindlebig - Copy twittersmallwhitebg Scotcoverwhitesquare - Copy Amazonlarge kindlebig - Copy twittersmallwhitebg Amazonlarge kindlebig - Copy kindlebig - Copy twittersmallwhitebg America-Flag-Download-PNG America-Flag-Download-PNG America-Flag-Download-PNG America-Flag-Download-PNG Amazonlarge iconsquare TOLB